Cliche-Free Lunch

The biggest cliche of them all is that all cliches are true; which, like a snake eating its tail, proves its own premise--and is its own conclusion. The fact of the matter is that all cliches are true: don't put all your eggs in one basket; a penny saved is a penny earned; brevity is the soul of wit; the book is better than the movie; you don't know what you got until it's gone; every rose has its thorn; it's not the heat, it's the humidity; beauty is in the eye of the beholder; the hooker has a heart of gold; the secret love affair between the head cheerleader and the dorky nice guy that is tutoring her in chemistry; the forbidden love affair between the rich girl and the boy from the wrong side of the tracks; the janitor/mechanic is secretly a genius; the wise old black man; naughty girls need love too; in a horror movie when the car won't start you always give it one last try; the best thing since sliced bread; there is no such thing as a free lunch. Wait a second, Pete may have jumped the gun. Because Pete's co-worker won 20 burritos from Chipotle for the second time in the past year--does lightning strike twice? And if free lunches do exist, then maybe everything that Pete thought was true is actually the opposite of true--not true? Maybe Pete should put all his eggs in one basket; maybe Pete shouldn't bring home the bacon; maybe Pete shouldn't wake up or smell the coffee. Pete's world has been turned upside down by this strange turn of events--or maybe it has been turned right side up by this normal turn of events. Pete just doesn't know anymore, he's as clueless as a man wearing a Bluetooth headset on a date.